So my 11th Month in Korea is drawing to a close. Its been a long month and a month of many surprises. I have decided to stay another month because I have many answers and hopes that I still have yet to answer. I am not entirely sure where to go to next or what to do but I am desperately praying and just hoping.
My life here in Korea has completed me in many ways. I came here to get a new perspective and to actually see how this part of the world works. I wanted to understand what people on the other side of the planet were like in all regards and I wanted to get away from the boring monotony that surrounded me at home. Now that I am almost done I am not sure how I feel about returning to such a life. I know I will not go back the same. I also hope that my life here in Korea wasn't for nothing I do want everything that I have come to stand up for and believe in to work out regardless of when I leave.
May started out as what would have been my last full month in Korea. It was a month that transformed me like none other.
I have witnessed people with no concept in the classroom destroy the teachers feelings and ended up making for a hectic week in the early onset of May. Its that type of attitude that has made me stand up and fight for change. How can a student so blatantly defy and disrespect a teacher. Foul language is Universal. Most language whether English, Korean or other can be translated. That is proof that we all have like mind and have similar goals albeit a little different ways to achieve them.
Its Spring and the weather is wonderful. Flowers are budding and Korea everything is in full bloom. People are carrying umbrella's around whether for the rain that comes sporadically or to use as a coolant system under the hot soon to be summer sun.
Many of my posts have talked about Yale in a Negative Spotlight. I have discussed many things that I feel are justifiably strange or a paradox of what Life and work are all about. I have come to the conclusion that everyone has their own way of looking at things, our own separate agenda's and in many ways things will stay the same. I refuse to write about weird things at work now because it is a complete waste of time (SSDD). What has happened to me during my time here in YALE is inconsequential. I did what I needed to do at that time.
I will be the first to admit that I do have some regrets about happenings and things I did or didn't do but that's yesteryear and now its time to just focus on Today or Now.
May was a month where Big decisions had to be made. I have chosen to stay until July. While I am not entirely sure about what will happen after July I do know that I will continue to strive for more and more. I got something perfect out of a messy situation. I say messy because I have had to use the word negativity to describe my workplace. I don't know why people get all bent out of shape when I mentioned bad happenings because I have heard just as many from many people as well. Its a fact that people just need to live by instead of feeling awful about things. I choose to worry about things that only I can't control.
I have dealt with a lot in the 11 months that I have been here and this month has marked no different.
Month in Review:
I worked every Saturday. Truthfully, Yale is all about the work and unfortunately I feel no value in my teaching because there is no real day to reflect on what I have done.
I had 2 wonderful weekends with Christina. WE had a nice Seoul Trip. We saw many interesting sites and I can't wait to go back there again. I truly can see myself living and working in Seoul by her side for at least a year if I found a desirable job.
I met Christina's brother. I hope to meet more of her family. I think that there is nothing that can't be overcome. I am familiar with Korean ways of thinking and I have come to lose a lot of my American ways of looking at things in order to better understand Korea. I know I can now live successfully in Korea. Whether I wanted to or not I quit being an American for a year of my life in order to try to fit in here.
At the closure of the month I just want to find something better. My life in Korea has had more to do with just finding myself in the middle of this situation. I have separated my time here in 3 parts: Korea time/Work time/MY time. There is a difference in each 3.
Now I just hope to figure out something before its too late. I look to June with nothing but full of promise. I really want to unleash all of my Dreams and make everything work.
Saturday, May 31, 2008
Dreaming Effect
Today was a day full of surprises. I had coffee with the Director on the 4th Floor and had a nice chat with him. I had a conversation with two of my best friends, and I watched basketball in the morning. At Work I had a small talk with Vicki, and 4 classes of which had a varying degree of problems in them.
I don't care for the most part. I had a wonderful TC1 class even though I told them to quit fooling around with some goofy antics. pitiless as to what is to come later in the day. TC2 daily antics nothing changes. TD3 my Saturday students who are very good, and easy and lastly the most immature class I have TD2 the three girls who dropped because they couldn't handle it earlier when they were doing Reading Advantage II and decided to come back and now just play. I will not write about them here and now I am feeling bothered.
After having a horrific meltdown in classes on Saturday I went to a fine dinner cuisine with my darling. I wanted to treat her to a meal fit for Kings and Queens because when I am with her I feel like Royalty.
Work was fast and I was just glad to get it over with. I got my babysitting hours in for the Saturday.
Seeing Christina made my bad feeling go away. I would just as soon forget the insidious comments and preposterous happenings of TD2. All I will say is I feel scarred.
WE went to a Fine Mediterranean Cuisine Restaurant and had some nice platters of beef and pork.
After Dinner Christina and I met her brother again and went to Guemo San to enjoy the night and talk. Her brother did a fine job with his English. I am happy to have met him and wish I knew him better. He is probably one of the few friends I have here.
Sitting up near the mountain was a wonderful feeling and made me remember all the times I have hiked the mountain with Christina and how much more I do want to go. Its a nice place above a busy city. The mountain is a sanctuary for people to get rid of their stress.
Its also a nice place to share dreams and where I see a lot of chances to happen. I Love Korea so much because there are many nice and rewarding things. I don't want to give up anything that I have here.
My feeling on the mountain is one of perfect tranquility and calm it makes me feel so refreshed and wonderful, its the only feeling I have when I have Christina by my side.
I don't care for the most part. I had a wonderful TC1 class even though I told them to quit fooling around with some goofy antics. pitiless as to what is to come later in the day. TC2 daily antics nothing changes. TD3 my Saturday students who are very good, and easy and lastly the most immature class I have TD2 the three girls who dropped because they couldn't handle it earlier when they were doing Reading Advantage II and decided to come back and now just play. I will not write about them here and now I am feeling bothered.
After having a horrific meltdown in classes on Saturday I went to a fine dinner cuisine with my darling. I wanted to treat her to a meal fit for Kings and Queens because when I am with her I feel like Royalty.
Work was fast and I was just glad to get it over with. I got my babysitting hours in for the Saturday.
Seeing Christina made my bad feeling go away. I would just as soon forget the insidious comments and preposterous happenings of TD2. All I will say is I feel scarred.
WE went to a Fine Mediterranean Cuisine Restaurant and had some nice platters of beef and pork.
After Dinner Christina and I met her brother again and went to Guemo San to enjoy the night and talk. Her brother did a fine job with his English. I am happy to have met him and wish I knew him better. He is probably one of the few friends I have here.
Sitting up near the mountain was a wonderful feeling and made me remember all the times I have hiked the mountain with Christina and how much more I do want to go. Its a nice place above a busy city. The mountain is a sanctuary for people to get rid of their stress.
Its also a nice place to share dreams and where I see a lot of chances to happen. I Love Korea so much because there are many nice and rewarding things. I don't want to give up anything that I have here.
My feeling on the mountain is one of perfect tranquility and calm it makes me feel so refreshed and wonderful, its the only feeling I have when I have Christina by my side.
Friday, May 30, 2008
Sites and Sounds
I'm trying a new approach to my blog writing and hope that this trend can be better in the coming month/stories.
As my Uncle said to me in a email I have become accustomed to what Korea really is like. I am not a tourist and I am not a foreigner on some escapade or wild excursion this is my Home away from Home. I have changed a great deal and will continue to do so. I don't think its coming to Korea that has changed me though, I personally feel that since graduating and needing to get some money saved has made me become more of a man with principles, drives and ambitions. What I have stumbled across here in Korea has made my missions all the more powerful and important. Before Coming here one thing I could say is that I didn't care before what was happening in the world. Now I can help change a small part of our world one community at a time.
I have gotten myself into a usual routine where my morning habits and nightly routines are more or less conglomerated into one will mesh of happenings. Each night I write a story and all the time it does read like a newspaper.
I do try to give each story its own personal slant though and develop from there.
I walk somewhere to eat for breakfast. I have decided to expand my territory and go to a place called PAPPAROTTI
This place makes wonderful Buns with butter inside. I think they are a healthy and wonderful treat. I watched Law and Order and then had myself some buns with Christina.
I walk the street from my house to where there is McDonalds and even further is the park/library. Its the best place in Hyung-gok dong. Papparoti is nestled between Mcdonalds and the park. It provides a perfect morning getaway.
Hyung gok dong seriously is a quiet place in the morning. The only people out at this time are the Da Bong Girls who ride their scooters to provide tea services. There are also a few business men trolling the streets but nothing important is happening until after Lunch around 12. This means that people usually do personal things like shop, pay bills, rest, or exercise etc in the morning.
Work Time rolls around like it always does SAME Situation Different Day (SSDD TABLOID) I have had enough though complaining in my blog about kid situations its just a job with the same kind of shenanigans and tomfoolery that any other job would have as well.
Each day Monday through Friday I get my bank coffee with Christina, and Vicki and we are literally surrounded by the sights and sounds of Korea. The kids come at precisely 2:20 and you can hear them running up the stairs leading to the Academy at full throttle. Sometimes, its a welcoming sight to talk to a few of them and other times I want them to get out of here so I can focus on my preparation or talking about personal things with Christina and Vicki.
Today I want to explore Handwriting more I think it looks fun its something I will do next week for sure. This week is relaxing and resting for a busy first week of June. I am seeing huge things coming up that I got to prepare myself for.
Today was a busy work day as is the same for every MONDAY WEDNESDAY AND FRIDAY. I had 6 classes and had sometime to finish reports etc. I went to have a private meeting about a student because I am tired of seeing the bad affects he has on me, Vicki and Christina. His troubles aren't worth teachers expense.
I may have problems with my boss, I may have problems with a lot of the kids but I have learned to see things differently too. I write this in my blog a lot because it is so important to me. I am trying to define who I am and cast away all doubt because there is nothing more important than knowing and understanding someone.
Whatever the job brings daily I am comforted that I have an amazing woman to the right of me and that we can face these challenges together. For all times sake this is my feeling. And for all of my complaining and problems I do have something wonderful and there is no other way I would rather have it...I got something good^^beyond any doubt..
As my Uncle said to me in a email I have become accustomed to what Korea really is like. I am not a tourist and I am not a foreigner on some escapade or wild excursion this is my Home away from Home. I have changed a great deal and will continue to do so. I don't think its coming to Korea that has changed me though, I personally feel that since graduating and needing to get some money saved has made me become more of a man with principles, drives and ambitions. What I have stumbled across here in Korea has made my missions all the more powerful and important. Before Coming here one thing I could say is that I didn't care before what was happening in the world. Now I can help change a small part of our world one community at a time.
I have gotten myself into a usual routine where my morning habits and nightly routines are more or less conglomerated into one will mesh of happenings. Each night I write a story and all the time it does read like a newspaper.
I do try to give each story its own personal slant though and develop from there.
I walk somewhere to eat for breakfast. I have decided to expand my territory and go to a place called PAPPAROTTI
This place makes wonderful Buns with butter inside. I think they are a healthy and wonderful treat. I watched Law and Order and then had myself some buns with Christina.
I walk the street from my house to where there is McDonalds and even further is the park/library. Its the best place in Hyung-gok dong. Papparoti is nestled between Mcdonalds and the park. It provides a perfect morning getaway.
Hyung gok dong seriously is a quiet place in the morning. The only people out at this time are the Da Bong Girls who ride their scooters to provide tea services. There are also a few business men trolling the streets but nothing important is happening until after Lunch around 12. This means that people usually do personal things like shop, pay bills, rest, or exercise etc in the morning.
Work Time rolls around like it always does SAME Situation Different Day (SSDD TABLOID) I have had enough though complaining in my blog about kid situations its just a job with the same kind of shenanigans and tomfoolery that any other job would have as well.
Each day Monday through Friday I get my bank coffee with Christina, and Vicki and we are literally surrounded by the sights and sounds of Korea. The kids come at precisely 2:20 and you can hear them running up the stairs leading to the Academy at full throttle. Sometimes, its a welcoming sight to talk to a few of them and other times I want them to get out of here so I can focus on my preparation or talking about personal things with Christina and Vicki.
Today I want to explore Handwriting more I think it looks fun its something I will do next week for sure. This week is relaxing and resting for a busy first week of June. I am seeing huge things coming up that I got to prepare myself for.
Today was a busy work day as is the same for every MONDAY WEDNESDAY AND FRIDAY. I had 6 classes and had sometime to finish reports etc. I went to have a private meeting about a student because I am tired of seeing the bad affects he has on me, Vicki and Christina. His troubles aren't worth teachers expense.
I may have problems with my boss, I may have problems with a lot of the kids but I have learned to see things differently too. I write this in my blog a lot because it is so important to me. I am trying to define who I am and cast away all doubt because there is nothing more important than knowing and understanding someone.
Whatever the job brings daily I am comforted that I have an amazing woman to the right of me and that we can face these challenges together. For all times sake this is my feeling. And for all of my complaining and problems I do have something wonderful and there is no other way I would rather have it...I got something good^^beyond any doubt..
Thursday, May 29, 2008
A Different Taste
Today one of my kids asked me if I had a headache he asked me because I felt haggard and to be honest I was filled with worry and a little guilt because some of my comments can be bad timed. I am fighting teacher but I do just wish I knew what I could do to make things right.
Why I all of a sudden thought about this I am not sure but I do know how I will get through the teaching day when I am leaving because I will miss a good class like TC1 whose wildness and interest is a nice mixture. The kid who asked me has some interesting tales but I haven't given him time lately because I have been consumed with my own thoughts about class prep, working in the future and other things related to my life. He has a younger brother who is not as smart as him. One brother is smart, understand English to a good level and shows respect, the other plays, is a little goofy and is small for his age. They are polar opposites. I have too many kids lets just leave it at that. I will miss TC1 class, and many of the students on an individual level. Thank God that's down the road for now and not in the near future. I just write that though because there are many personal stories about the kids and the kids are important to me. I don't want my readers to think I am hating kids.
I have kids complaining about American Cows, I have kids calling me stupid, I have kids who said Japan isn't good America isn't good and I fight for that attitude to change because I believe that to be my future and that's why I was choking on tears throughout the day I want kids who are immature, troublesome, and a headache to appreciate what I am trying to do for them because mostly I care.
I have read a lot of things happening to people and things around here that are depressing. Hostilities and Closed mindedness from Americans, Koreans and other people I want to see changed.
I will FIGHT hopefully stronger but as everyone who already knows me best my heart is wrapped or vested in something larger than life and I don't care if I write to the end of the day about that or anything.
Why I all of a sudden thought about this I am not sure but I do know how I will get through the teaching day when I am leaving because I will miss a good class like TC1 whose wildness and interest is a nice mixture. The kid who asked me has some interesting tales but I haven't given him time lately because I have been consumed with my own thoughts about class prep, working in the future and other things related to my life. He has a younger brother who is not as smart as him. One brother is smart, understand English to a good level and shows respect, the other plays, is a little goofy and is small for his age. They are polar opposites. I have too many kids lets just leave it at that. I will miss TC1 class, and many of the students on an individual level. Thank God that's down the road for now and not in the near future. I just write that though because there are many personal stories about the kids and the kids are important to me. I don't want my readers to think I am hating kids.
I have kids complaining about American Cows, I have kids calling me stupid, I have kids who said Japan isn't good America isn't good and I fight for that attitude to change because I believe that to be my future and that's why I was choking on tears throughout the day I want kids who are immature, troublesome, and a headache to appreciate what I am trying to do for them because mostly I care.
I have read a lot of things happening to people and things around here that are depressing. Hostilities and Closed mindedness from Americans, Koreans and other people I want to see changed.
I will FIGHT hopefully stronger but as everyone who already knows me best my heart is wrapped or vested in something larger than life and I don't care if I write to the end of the day about that or anything.
Authoritative Showdown
Reader Be Ware Sensitive Material ahead...
I feel like I am having to defend myself too much lately. Lets just say that I am living the life I would like to live other than facing many oddities at work. Its something that I am overcoming and its my cross to bare. I am comfortable and fine with all written information and don't think anyone should care too much~I think its odd that anyone would care too much about what I write but that's just me.
Today I ended up showing some authority in class. Its Thursday and its a day I like the most out of the week. I have 3 classes, 4 breaks, and plenty of time to think and relatively enjoy.
Vicki and I talked about school and life. Vicki is a wonderful co-worker and its good that we can have conversations about everything. ME, her and Christina are perfect company. It was same as when Pearl was here. When Pearl quit I hated the job. She made it easier to go to work.
Our conversations are always so serious about work and related happenings. There is a lot of good natured fun to but its only between the 3 of us. We all have a like mind. We all think that the situation is less than ideal and strange and that the only good things that come out of it are between the three of us and our office humor. She is someone that Christina and I both need a lot I feel.
My talk made me feel sad because I realized a lot of things when I was speaking and I just want to try to find a way to not make people feel prejudice about me. I have nothing but good intentions. Truth be known I cry about this many nights because I want to show that I am not simply American.
My first class was Yuntagee class in MB3. I have often joked that he is the devil and at any rate he is a spoilsport. He ruins the fun we have in class and takes all of my energy just to control him. I wish my 3 best friends would read this they would be laughing their asses off.
I kicked a 5 year old out of my class. He came waltzing in like he owned the place. Sat down and stuffed a balloon in his mouth. He was making such a fuss that he was distracting the entire class within 1 minute of his arrival. He came 20 minutes late. I told him to leave the classroom and I simply walked him to the door and told him bye. He left willingly and I was relieved to be rid of him. This kid is so bad that not only should he not be in the Academy, I have changed the name of MB3 to Yungtag Class. I don't want to teach him. People like him don't belong at a private school.
What people don't get back home is that this isn't a school where you actually learn top notch English or even just learn English its poking and prodding done to kids who don't care at all and would just as soon not be there. I have no patience for him or kids like him anymore. My teaching at a lonely Academy goes by to fast to really even notice whether the kids are learning or not. Its just a job where I am bringing home the bacon so to speak.
I am here for a month longer (at least) I am hoping to find a decent situation but I worry now because I don't want my darling to be caught in his entangled web of money grubbing schemes that are only to make the Academy Successful. Teachers are supposedly replaceable thats the feeling I have gotten here because I have seen 2 teachers come and go and I have heard many stories from all sorts of people.
So I finished my 3 classes without so much as a blink of an eye. I worried a little because I had made a mistake that I didn't know how to fix. I am thankful to say it worked out well. I had a nice Galbei Dinner at our usual place and it was nice to just go out and enjoy the nice breezy evening. Preparations for a busy Friday and unfortunately for me a Saturday of work to follow.
Its almost JUNE pray for me if that's what you do.
I am doing fine in the Land of the Morning Calm and finding ways to quell my fears as well. Don't worry so much about what is written but worry instead of things that are more relative to your situations. I have a handle on mine. I am dealing with Korea, America, and Yale and of the 3 one is home, the other is interesting and wonderful and the last one has some peculiarities that are Byoung in nature.
Here's something different:
Wednesday, May 28, 2008
Drizzle Effect
It rained heavily today. I hope its not a sign of an early wet season. Its hard to believe that I have been here for a year and personally I don't want to think about it like that. It does make me feel sad to leave and sometimes I can't bear it.
For all of my complaining about my Life in Korea I have found many amazing things. I have developed a routine here where I have many things that I would like to have completely in my life and never change. I just want a new place and take away some elements with me.
The Rain pours like none other here. Its just one big surging typhoon like water that leaves you drenched and doesn't stop. It reminds me of Wisconsin in many ways. Korea is lush green and unfortunately nowadays it will be constantly too hot. I have gotten used to the hotness and the lack of proper air con and situations at work but the kids haven't. Maybe to some people I seem ruthless when it comes to teaching but if one thing can be learned from me it is my ability to endure. I tell the kids Oh you are hungry, me too, and I am hot and I am tired too but just wait. Complaining is the worst thing in the world. BE Quiet and do something about it. I told them that they are here in my classroom they need to just face up to the situation. For the life of me I can't speak to them in English because they fail to answer me at all.
I am scared to teach because my preparation means squat its just if I control the kids good enough for Mr. J to let me pass for the day.
Today I had 6 classes back to back.
After work I had a snack with Christina and relaxed. It was a long day of teaching and I am just happy its Thursday tomorrow. I can accomplish a lot I think.
I need to save more money and I need to work harder this coming week. Its almost June and its scary to me.
Inside the classroom the kids stare in befuddlement as I count down the minutes to the clock. Whether its right or wrong I am just trying to be more determined about work experience and find a way to improve. I help the kids who want to learn and punish the ones that don't in hopes that they will follow suit but it seldom works out that way.
For all of my complaining about my Life in Korea I have found many amazing things. I have developed a routine here where I have many things that I would like to have completely in my life and never change. I just want a new place and take away some elements with me.
The Rain pours like none other here. Its just one big surging typhoon like water that leaves you drenched and doesn't stop. It reminds me of Wisconsin in many ways. Korea is lush green and unfortunately nowadays it will be constantly too hot. I have gotten used to the hotness and the lack of proper air con and situations at work but the kids haven't. Maybe to some people I seem ruthless when it comes to teaching but if one thing can be learned from me it is my ability to endure. I tell the kids Oh you are hungry, me too, and I am hot and I am tired too but just wait. Complaining is the worst thing in the world. BE Quiet and do something about it. I told them that they are here in my classroom they need to just face up to the situation. For the life of me I can't speak to them in English because they fail to answer me at all.
I am scared to teach because my preparation means squat its just if I control the kids good enough for Mr. J to let me pass for the day.
Today I had 6 classes back to back.
After work I had a snack with Christina and relaxed. It was a long day of teaching and I am just happy its Thursday tomorrow. I can accomplish a lot I think.
I need to save more money and I need to work harder this coming week. Its almost June and its scary to me.
Inside the classroom the kids stare in befuddlement as I count down the minutes to the clock. Whether its right or wrong I am just trying to be more determined about work experience and find a way to improve. I help the kids who want to learn and punish the ones that don't in hopes that they will follow suit but it seldom works out that way.
Tuesday, May 27, 2008
Bloggers End
A phone call in the morning prompted me to action. I was so tired and hadn't slept well last night but yet again another unnerving phone call lambasted me to action.
I would like to fix some misconstrued claims that I have. People everywhere have these mis perceptions about me or people's way of life that require Education to be prevalent in society.
I have heard many people say that my Blogs are too sensitive or personal. I write too much opinions about any subject from A-Z. In my opinion, there is no subject too taboo. I censor my blogs as it is and what I put in I feel is important. I am going to try to give a detailed description of simply factual based information. I personally feel that if my writing is getting a rise out of people then it is doing its job. I report my happenings as I see it. I try to be as forthcoming and honest as I possibly can and it rancors me when people misconstrue or fail to even submit a question via email, blog or even a phone call etc.
When people read the news most of the time they take no action. Its our jobs as human beings to take action where we see fit and try to make a difference. If my material is offensive or makes you to sensitive I need you to tell me How Why etc. I would gladly expand more information to answer questions. PLEASE POST QUESTIONS this can become a reform post haste blog as well.
KIDS---I came to be an English Teacher. I wanted public school, I wanted a big city and I preferred adults. I didn't get any of those. I asked my Recruiting Company to place me somewhere that would fit that criteria loll and be hold it didn't happen.
I was put with kids from ages 5 to 13. I worked at Manito-wish where I helped make a difference in kids' lives involving the same age group. I didn't have as many problems and you could probably contribute it to the fact that they could speak English.
So, kids are learning English over here and I am dealing with it. Here is the situation I feel. I believe these are all facts.
1. I sit in the classroom for 45 minutes with kids who can't understand most English. I have to code switch just to get my main points across. The kids have different language abilities and I do this for usually 6 classes. Unfortunately, most of them don't want to be here because they don't realize the importance or how special it is to know 2 languages. Motivating them is beyond me. How can I motivate them when they don't even try to learn English. Reading Vocabulary is funny to them. They rush it and don't even try to read correctly. I truly feel that they don't have to respect me at all because its a private school and they can leave as they please.
I have never said I hate the kids I don't like dealing with many of them because they are aggravating. I have been bitten, called stupid, etc. I have taken up these issues with my boss who has done nothing but ridicule my teaching method. He fails to understand that if he was teaching Korean to 5 year old American he would be met with the same adversity. He doesn't understand that the kids don't like him at all and like me more because I don't punish as much.
I have also changed my style yet again to reward and not punish as much. I get more satisfaction when I reward and not punish. Kids are kids and I am dealing with them as best as I can. I have one kid who acts so poorly though that I write about him a lot. He slams doors in our faces, screams, pouts and our boss just watches in idleness. He should be removed from school because he bit me once, and he just doesn't have a clue. But he is 5 years old and my boss needs all the dough he can get.
Now if I have said something incriminating TELL ME. I am seething at the teeth here because people fail to act human and simply tell me what they think. That that is the kids situation.
I am at my wits end getting emails/or angry phone calls that are full of misinterpretations.
My blog is simply my way of communicating with the world. I am on a time frame and therefore I can't call at a whim anyone. I ran out of money on my phone card today. I don't want to spend a lot of money on calls that are rather pointless anyways.
What else do you want to know? I will try to create a discussion forum for anyone who is interested.
YALE---What happens in YALE stays in Yale. Its a job I get my money and I am trying to save it up. I have a Dream and it has to do with Korea because I do like living in Korea just not here in Gumi working at Yale. SSDD gets you nowhere. I am fighting teacher and trying to understand this more and more each day.
I am at my Bloggers end because my stories are whatever they are. They aren't to be misinterpreted they are meant for discussion. If you are bored enough and have the time you should write me: 1. here 2. Email 3. Facebook. 4. however you think.
I am tired of hearing negative things from people who don't understand~~~~
I would also like to say that in no way am I trying to cause bad feelings or resentment but rather I am trying to get people to wake up and see that there is always more than meets the eye. I truly feel that my writings should trigger some response from anyone to do something more with their life. Instead of feeling sensitive and not wanting to read more simply ask then you can understand more and you will not feel so judgmental.
I have a lot of things to say but I will end it at that. Bloggers end signifies that I am considering ending my writing because of so much negativity but that would be giving in to what people want. You don't read Biographies for the sake of enjoyment you read them to see what they did and possibly overcame in order to help you achieve what you need. What people truly feel helps create a growing conscience in the publics eye or anyone who happens to read it.
I think if you don't want to read more about Korea and my life then simply don't read it. My story is my experience and shouldn't be taken out of context. I am fighting Teacher for Change for more understanding for better English, for Humanitarian Recognition etc. I am a Teacher and I am trying my best in order to insure a stable future and a better tomorrow.
I could go on and on about more ideas but I think that this is enough for anyone who wants to change their perspectives for now. I am constantly changing mine. Its part of living abroad you have to change your mind and deal with consequences. What I have gone through is what no one in the world can understand because while there is many foreigners teaching English in Korea there is only one Nick in Gumi.
In all walks of life its best to try to just understand and develop a new persona please respond! I have to get ready for work soon and so therefore I will be back later tonight or American Morning time. I am bubbling with ideas and hopes to find achievement no matter how lackluster things seems to be.
I would like to fix some misconstrued claims that I have. People everywhere have these mis perceptions about me or people's way of life that require Education to be prevalent in society.
I have heard many people say that my Blogs are too sensitive or personal. I write too much opinions about any subject from A-Z. In my opinion, there is no subject too taboo. I censor my blogs as it is and what I put in I feel is important. I am going to try to give a detailed description of simply factual based information. I personally feel that if my writing is getting a rise out of people then it is doing its job. I report my happenings as I see it. I try to be as forthcoming and honest as I possibly can and it rancors me when people misconstrue or fail to even submit a question via email, blog or even a phone call etc.
When people read the news most of the time they take no action. Its our jobs as human beings to take action where we see fit and try to make a difference. If my material is offensive or makes you to sensitive I need you to tell me How Why etc. I would gladly expand more information to answer questions. PLEASE POST QUESTIONS this can become a reform post haste blog as well.
KIDS---I came to be an English Teacher. I wanted public school, I wanted a big city and I preferred adults. I didn't get any of those. I asked my Recruiting Company to place me somewhere that would fit that criteria loll and be hold it didn't happen.
I was put with kids from ages 5 to 13. I worked at Manito-wish where I helped make a difference in kids' lives involving the same age group. I didn't have as many problems and you could probably contribute it to the fact that they could speak English.
So, kids are learning English over here and I am dealing with it. Here is the situation I feel. I believe these are all facts.
1. I sit in the classroom for 45 minutes with kids who can't understand most English. I have to code switch just to get my main points across. The kids have different language abilities and I do this for usually 6 classes. Unfortunately, most of them don't want to be here because they don't realize the importance or how special it is to know 2 languages. Motivating them is beyond me. How can I motivate them when they don't even try to learn English. Reading Vocabulary is funny to them. They rush it and don't even try to read correctly. I truly feel that they don't have to respect me at all because its a private school and they can leave as they please.
I have never said I hate the kids I don't like dealing with many of them because they are aggravating. I have been bitten, called stupid, etc. I have taken up these issues with my boss who has done nothing but ridicule my teaching method. He fails to understand that if he was teaching Korean to 5 year old American he would be met with the same adversity. He doesn't understand that the kids don't like him at all and like me more because I don't punish as much.
I have also changed my style yet again to reward and not punish as much. I get more satisfaction when I reward and not punish. Kids are kids and I am dealing with them as best as I can. I have one kid who acts so poorly though that I write about him a lot. He slams doors in our faces, screams, pouts and our boss just watches in idleness. He should be removed from school because he bit me once, and he just doesn't have a clue. But he is 5 years old and my boss needs all the dough he can get.
Now if I have said something incriminating TELL ME. I am seething at the teeth here because people fail to act human and simply tell me what they think. That that is the kids situation.
I am at my wits end getting emails/or angry phone calls that are full of misinterpretations.
My blog is simply my way of communicating with the world. I am on a time frame and therefore I can't call at a whim anyone. I ran out of money on my phone card today. I don't want to spend a lot of money on calls that are rather pointless anyways.
What else do you want to know? I will try to create a discussion forum for anyone who is interested.
YALE---What happens in YALE stays in Yale. Its a job I get my money and I am trying to save it up. I have a Dream and it has to do with Korea because I do like living in Korea just not here in Gumi working at Yale. SSDD gets you nowhere. I am fighting teacher and trying to understand this more and more each day.
I am at my Bloggers end because my stories are whatever they are. They aren't to be misinterpreted they are meant for discussion. If you are bored enough and have the time you should write me: 1. here 2. Email 3. Facebook. 4. however you think.
I am tired of hearing negative things from people who don't understand~~~~
I would also like to say that in no way am I trying to cause bad feelings or resentment but rather I am trying to get people to wake up and see that there is always more than meets the eye. I truly feel that my writings should trigger some response from anyone to do something more with their life. Instead of feeling sensitive and not wanting to read more simply ask then you can understand more and you will not feel so judgmental.
I have a lot of things to say but I will end it at that. Bloggers end signifies that I am considering ending my writing because of so much negativity but that would be giving in to what people want. You don't read Biographies for the sake of enjoyment you read them to see what they did and possibly overcame in order to help you achieve what you need. What people truly feel helps create a growing conscience in the publics eye or anyone who happens to read it.
I think if you don't want to read more about Korea and my life then simply don't read it. My story is my experience and shouldn't be taken out of context. I am fighting Teacher for Change for more understanding for better English, for Humanitarian Recognition etc. I am a Teacher and I am trying my best in order to insure a stable future and a better tomorrow.
I could go on and on about more ideas but I think that this is enough for anyone who wants to change their perspectives for now. I am constantly changing mine. Its part of living abroad you have to change your mind and deal with consequences. What I have gone through is what no one in the world can understand because while there is many foreigners teaching English in Korea there is only one Nick in Gumi.
In all walks of life its best to try to just understand and develop a new persona please respond! I have to get ready for work soon and so therefore I will be back later tonight or American Morning time. I am bubbling with ideas and hopes to find achievement no matter how lackluster things seems to be.
Circus Parade
I felt a little down today. I had a great morning with Christina at the Library I do enjoy going there because I want to help her study and do whatever I can in order to make it happen. It means so much to me.
Work was a different story. After having some nice noodles with Christina for lunch it was all business as usual. I even dressed up for the occasion wearing a tie that cost me equivalent to 15 dollars or less. Its a really nice shirt but I think I am impersonating someone.
Today I am frustrated and so I will vent here. I don't know if writing helps but I do it solely for the purpose that the people I love the most can better understand me. I have always wanted to take advantage of everything there is to do and know about living in Korea. I have felt like I am living my own personal bubble because Yale Academy has isolated me from experiencing true Korea.
I am worried that I will never be able to do the same great things that we did like on May12th and I am scared to think about later. I love Korea a lot I like the food I like the determination people have and how nice people are. There are many wonderful things about Korea but unfortunately Yale isn't one of them.
I don't care what other teachers have experienced at Hawgwans but mine has been strange. I have a system that is sketchy. The copy machine is faulty, the markers I use for class don't work worth beans, the secretary is in charge of the money system, administering new kids and reporting to Mr. Jeong about all the changes which she neglects. She doesn't speak any English nor make any attempt to interact with me. The kids are awful to me nowadays. I am talked at completely in Korean and I therefore can't teach at all. Lately, I feel like I am going back in time like when I first got here and how everything seemed so nice. The smells were good, the kids were problems but it was just part of my breaking in experience. I thought things would change within a few weeks.
I am scared because I want Korea to like me so much I didn't do anything bad to anyone and I have no ill feelings about anyone truly I just want to do my part to make this world better. I don't think like an American and sometimes I wish I could take away my characteristics that make me stick out here because I am not wanting to be known as that.
And so the Clowning around will continue I will just have to juggle things a little more and think more carefully I am missing something.
Todays classes no one talked to me in English and the kids made a mockery of me like they do everyday or they just sat there and didn't say a word. I will go to work tomorrow and get 6 classes of abuse and if I dare complain my boss will just make me feel worthless. I still believe in Miracles though ~~~~
Work was a different story. After having some nice noodles with Christina for lunch it was all business as usual. I even dressed up for the occasion wearing a tie that cost me equivalent to 15 dollars or less. Its a really nice shirt but I think I am impersonating someone.
Today I am frustrated and so I will vent here. I don't know if writing helps but I do it solely for the purpose that the people I love the most can better understand me. I have always wanted to take advantage of everything there is to do and know about living in Korea. I have felt like I am living my own personal bubble because Yale Academy has isolated me from experiencing true Korea.
I am worried that I will never be able to do the same great things that we did like on May12th and I am scared to think about later. I love Korea a lot I like the food I like the determination people have and how nice people are. There are many wonderful things about Korea but unfortunately Yale isn't one of them.
I don't care what other teachers have experienced at Hawgwans but mine has been strange. I have a system that is sketchy. The copy machine is faulty, the markers I use for class don't work worth beans, the secretary is in charge of the money system, administering new kids and reporting to Mr. Jeong about all the changes which she neglects. She doesn't speak any English nor make any attempt to interact with me. The kids are awful to me nowadays. I am talked at completely in Korean and I therefore can't teach at all. Lately, I feel like I am going back in time like when I first got here and how everything seemed so nice. The smells were good, the kids were problems but it was just part of my breaking in experience. I thought things would change within a few weeks.
I am scared because I want Korea to like me so much I didn't do anything bad to anyone and I have no ill feelings about anyone truly I just want to do my part to make this world better. I don't think like an American and sometimes I wish I could take away my characteristics that make me stick out here because I am not wanting to be known as that.
And so the Clowning around will continue I will just have to juggle things a little more and think more carefully I am missing something.
Todays classes no one talked to me in English and the kids made a mockery of me like they do everyday or they just sat there and didn't say a word. I will go to work tomorrow and get 6 classes of abuse and if I dare complain my boss will just make me feel worthless. I still believe in Miracles though ~~~~
Monday, May 26, 2008
Waiting on Bus 13
There's nothing like waking up to Monday mornings just knowing that its the beginning of the work week and for me that means I have 6 days in row. I have changed my feeling about this though since its also the start of a week of endless opportunities and where anything is possible.
Today I spent a lot of time waiting. I think it would be reasonable to say that a lot of my time is spent waiting. Its a routine for me to wait but today was a day spent in limber and passive involvement.
Let me just start off at the beginning~ I didn't sleep well last night. I am really worried about a lot of things. I am wanting to be real honest with everyone here. As my best friends know me I tend to think way to much. I am a little scared though thinking of my life in Korea. I was worried last night because of Health issues and just want to make sure everything is OK. I am trying to find a job and figure out a good course of action because even though July is far away I still am terrified about what can happen.
Today Christina and I went to the hospital. We sat in the waiting room and passed the time. Passing the time with Christina in idleness is never a waste of time. Going through everything with my best friend is so important to me and I wouldn't want to miss anything for the world. She's my best friend I haven't ever had a best friend before I never had someone I could go to without hesitation. I have many close friends but its different. I would like to just say that I will Always Wait for you no matter what circumstance.
Everyday, regardless of where I am going I am waiting for Bus 13 to come. Sometimes I want it to come faster and sometimes I want it to stay away and not come. Bus 13 carries my joy each day to me. After we go to the library where we open up our dreams and try to figure out things for later.
After the time at the hospital we waited for work. We had a nice lunch and later I shaved because my beard is getting long. So much for trying to infiltrate into Afghanistan. I would like to see how Afghanistan is doing ironically. If you are confused read the Kite Runner~that book is still the best one I read here I think.
Work was quick painless and rather boring. I am starting to play with the kids more and it seems to help. I just hate it when I get in trouble from the book. His favorite game is peek-a-boo some habits never change.
Today Christina, Vicki and I all noticed how weird the Jeongs are. Miss Jeong doesn't pass along important information to the boss(I thought she was a secretary)and He is shocked to hear what has been happening at the Academy since he isn't really inspecting the classrooms and he foolishly lets Miss Jeong handle a lot of Academy meetings when it comes to getting new students. I would be surprised if he knew exactly how many students he had in his academy. Its just a number to him anyway. I don't know all of their English names because I haven't given names to many students. The ones that don't participate I haven't given a name too. I feel like private schools are a complete waste of time if you as a student aren't going to try.
My Prayer is simple. I hope to find a good job, make more money, be a successful teacher, and show I can be a wonderful husband. If I needed to I would work harder. I always feel like I am playing against the clock nowadays and just want to make sure that I can figure out everything before its too late.
Its Monday but since I am going to bed soon its consequently Tuesday. I had a wonderful weekend and just want to make this week the best possible week there could be.
I was just waiting for classes to be over. I didn't want to get a headache from ill mannered bad tempered "mad cows" today... I am done putting up with senseless antics. I want to have good classes only and forget about all the Bullshit that is buried on top of Yale.
I will Fight more for making better here. Its getting better all the time.
Today I spent a lot of time waiting. I think it would be reasonable to say that a lot of my time is spent waiting. Its a routine for me to wait but today was a day spent in limber and passive involvement.
Let me just start off at the beginning~ I didn't sleep well last night. I am really worried about a lot of things. I am wanting to be real honest with everyone here. As my best friends know me I tend to think way to much. I am a little scared though thinking of my life in Korea. I was worried last night because of Health issues and just want to make sure everything is OK. I am trying to find a job and figure out a good course of action because even though July is far away I still am terrified about what can happen.
Today Christina and I went to the hospital. We sat in the waiting room and passed the time. Passing the time with Christina in idleness is never a waste of time. Going through everything with my best friend is so important to me and I wouldn't want to miss anything for the world. She's my best friend I haven't ever had a best friend before I never had someone I could go to without hesitation. I have many close friends but its different. I would like to just say that I will Always Wait for you no matter what circumstance.
Everyday, regardless of where I am going I am waiting for Bus 13 to come. Sometimes I want it to come faster and sometimes I want it to stay away and not come. Bus 13 carries my joy each day to me. After we go to the library where we open up our dreams and try to figure out things for later.
After the time at the hospital we waited for work. We had a nice lunch and later I shaved because my beard is getting long. So much for trying to infiltrate into Afghanistan. I would like to see how Afghanistan is doing ironically. If you are confused read the Kite Runner~that book is still the best one I read here I think.
Work was quick painless and rather boring. I am starting to play with the kids more and it seems to help. I just hate it when I get in trouble from the book. His favorite game is peek-a-boo some habits never change.
Today Christina, Vicki and I all noticed how weird the Jeongs are. Miss Jeong doesn't pass along important information to the boss(I thought she was a secretary)and He is shocked to hear what has been happening at the Academy since he isn't really inspecting the classrooms and he foolishly lets Miss Jeong handle a lot of Academy meetings when it comes to getting new students. I would be surprised if he knew exactly how many students he had in his academy. Its just a number to him anyway. I don't know all of their English names because I haven't given names to many students. The ones that don't participate I haven't given a name too. I feel like private schools are a complete waste of time if you as a student aren't going to try.
My Prayer is simple. I hope to find a good job, make more money, be a successful teacher, and show I can be a wonderful husband. If I needed to I would work harder. I always feel like I am playing against the clock nowadays and just want to make sure that I can figure out everything before its too late.
Its Monday but since I am going to bed soon its consequently Tuesday. I had a wonderful weekend and just want to make this week the best possible week there could be.
I was just waiting for classes to be over. I didn't want to get a headache from ill mannered bad tempered "mad cows" today... I am done putting up with senseless antics. I want to have good classes only and forget about all the Bullshit that is buried on top of Yale.
I will Fight more for making better here. Its getting better all the time.
Sunday, May 25, 2008
Celestial Feelings
The best part of Gumi is spending a Sunday Afternoon with nothing but time to enjoy what Korea has to offer. There is no other time or place I would rather be except in the voluptuous company or Christina.
Today's Outing included Lunch at a new place which was very good. Army soup is what we had. I don't like to think of the Army because in my opinion its the source of everything negative and the primordial reason for all mis-understandings. I strive and Fight for that to change but I don't know how.
NEXT we went to see a movie at the Theater and have a little CGV action. I saw Chronicles of Narnia Prince Caspain today. I have seen both Narnia movies with Christina. I think they are entertaining! They aren't the best movies but definitely worth watching.
After Watching the movie we shopped a little bit downtown. I bought a couple shirts and Christina got a nice dress. I like shopping too much but nowadays I am seeing the importance of shopping for Business and work related endeavors. I want to win the award for Gumi's Sexiest Couple. I think we have a good shot at winning this. Someday we will be Missoula's most Sexy couple. Hands down.
Anyways, Walking the streets of Downtown Gumi has made me a little tired and unfortunately I think the hot weather is giving me a headache. I feel a little tired and its only 8 oclock. I am going to cook something if I can find something worth eating in this house. If not I may have to go to the grocery store. Its going to be a fun and busy week. Its the last week of May and that means I need to finish tons of work.
I want to disregard kids' questions about when I am leaving because I am on a mission and that's all that is important to me.
I have a burning desire inside where Celestial feelings are on fire. As the days continue to go by I am finding constant solace with just my right arm for company. I don't want anything else. I will continue to push myself to new heights and extremes. I think I need to go hike the Mountain sometime. I want more than anything to just make our hearts flow and pour over like waterfalls.
I will write more later I need to take a little rest and or eat something...
Thank you for a wonderful day its always the best when I am with you today, now and Always I Love you and am so lucky to have found you.
Today's Outing included Lunch at a new place which was very good. Army soup is what we had. I don't like to think of the Army because in my opinion its the source of everything negative and the primordial reason for all mis-understandings. I strive and Fight for that to change but I don't know how.
NEXT we went to see a movie at the Theater and have a little CGV action. I saw Chronicles of Narnia Prince Caspain today. I have seen both Narnia movies with Christina. I think they are entertaining! They aren't the best movies but definitely worth watching.
After Watching the movie we shopped a little bit downtown. I bought a couple shirts and Christina got a nice dress. I like shopping too much but nowadays I am seeing the importance of shopping for Business and work related endeavors. I want to win the award for Gumi's Sexiest Couple. I think we have a good shot at winning this. Someday we will be Missoula's most Sexy couple. Hands down.
Anyways, Walking the streets of Downtown Gumi has made me a little tired and unfortunately I think the hot weather is giving me a headache. I feel a little tired and its only 8 oclock. I am going to cook something if I can find something worth eating in this house. If not I may have to go to the grocery store. Its going to be a fun and busy week. Its the last week of May and that means I need to finish tons of work.
I want to disregard kids' questions about when I am leaving because I am on a mission and that's all that is important to me.
I have a burning desire inside where Celestial feelings are on fire. As the days continue to go by I am finding constant solace with just my right arm for company. I don't want anything else. I will continue to push myself to new heights and extremes. I think I need to go hike the Mountain sometime. I want more than anything to just make our hearts flow and pour over like waterfalls.
I will write more later I need to take a little rest and or eat something...
Thank you for a wonderful day its always the best when I am with you today, now and Always I Love you and am so lucky to have found you.
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